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"I know nobody's forcing me to do it - I just don't think I can back out on something like that."

"I'm sure they'll understand, Kerry."

"It's a bit cheap though, isn't it, backing out on a charity" I said.

"They wouldn't want you to be uncomfortable and I'm sure there's other ways to raise money for them."

"You're very sweet, Justine," I said, putting my hand sub-consciously to my threatened hair.

"You'll just have to remember to count to ten next time before you volunteer for anything!" she said.

We finished our coffees and gathered various packages before heading back into the mall to finish our shopping.

I thought long and hard over the next couple of days about my pledge to the local hospital to shave my head and what Justine and I had discussed. The more I thought, the worse I felt about reneging on my promise. I even thought about getting a bank loan to make up for the money that the hospital would lose out on if I backed out. At rasher moments I thought that it would be best if I moved away so that I wouldn't have to bump into anyone from the fund raising committee in the supermarket!! At other times I decided that I was being stupid and should just get it over with. How hard could it be after all? It wouldn't take much effort to explain to people why I had done it and it would save all of the soul searching that I was going through. I had a brainwave. I rang Justine.

"I've had an idea" I said.

"I know all about your ideas" she replied.

There was a pause.

"Do it with me" I said.

"You're joking!" she said.

"Please Justine. I think I could do it if you do it with me" I pleaded.

"So let's get this straight. In a moment of madness, you agree to shave your head. You think long and hard and decide that you don't want to do it. Then you decide that you can do it if I do it as well".

"That's about right" I said, realising how silly it sounded when she put it like that.

"I'm going to have to think about it Kerry" she said. She paused. "I've thought about it" she said quickly.

"And...........?"

"No" she said dryly.

"Thanks for your solidarity" I said sarcastically.

"Don't be like that Kerry. It's a big thing you're asking."

"I know, and that's why I'm asking."

"Yea, but you're not asking to borrow a pair of shoes are you?"

"Don't worry, forget I asked." I said, and hung up.

I stared into space. Now I had upset my best friend and still had the original dilemma. There was nothing else for it. Chocolate and wine.

I was just getting ready for bed when the phone went.

"Kerry. It's me. I'm sorry" she said.

"No, I shouldn't have asked. It's me who should be sorry" I said.

"Look, can we meet for coffee tomorrow?"

"Kiss and make up, you mean."

"I'm only offering coffee, she said, a smile in her voice.

Arrangements made, I went to bed happier. My main regret being the amount of chocolate that I had managed to get down me.

The following day I walked into the coffee shop, seeing her already seated at a table by the window. I leaned forward to kiss her on the cheek, my hair falling forward as I moved towards her.

"You should get that cut" she said, brushing my hair away from her with her hand.

As the waitress walked away from the table with our order, Justine looked at me.

"How about if I get it cut, would that help?"

"Don't worry about it Justine, it was stupid."

"I'm serious, if it will help you I'll get mine cut."

I didn't know what to say.

"Really?" I asked.

"I need a trim, so another inch or so won't hurt" she said. I looked at her with her collar length brown hair, shiny, perfectly maintained.

"An inch" I said "so you're not going to..........?"

"You're the one who agreed to the shave" she said.

Our coffees arrived, we both fell silent while the waitress fussed with the cups and bits and pieces.

I picked my cup up to take a sip, knowing full well that it would be too hot. I could feel the steam as it approached my lips. I put the cup down again.

"More than an inch" I said feebly.

"Length really matters to you doesn't it?" she said with a twinkle in her eye.

"I'm not interested in less than seven inches" I said.

"What are we talking about here?" she said, her own cup halfway to her lips.

"Hair of course" I said.

"Seven inches. Dream on girl. I'll come with you. I'll get mine cut. That's my final offer." she said.

"It doesn't matter" I said. I'm not going to do it." The silence was awkward.

She drained her cup and picked up her bag.

"The offer's still open" she said as she stood and raised her hand in a parting gesture. I sat and stared into space. I decided that this wasn't worth harming our friendship for.

I paid the bill and wandered out into the street, looking aimlessly into an assortment of shop windows as I went, occasionally going into a shop for a closer look. I tried everything to try to put any recollection of our little get together out of my head. Furniture shops, clothes shops - I was in them all. I even allowed one of the painted harpies in the small department store's cosmetic department to apply some eye-liner before I realised the error of my ways. I returned to the sanctuary of the shops on the main street where there was little chance of confronting similar enthusiasm. I went back for a second look at a dress I had seen earlier, but still couldn't make up my mind whether to buy it or not. I managed to convince myself that I didn't really need it and that the only reason I was considering buying it was my spat with Justine earlier on. As I was leaving the store my phone rang.

"Where are you?" Justine asked.

"I'm in some dress shop on Bridge Street" I replied.

"Can you meet me at 'Creations' on Trinity Street, quickly as you can."

"Justine..." I started to say, but she had hung up. I put the dress back on the rack and headed for the door, a little bewildered by her call.

It took me five minutes or so to get down to the other end of town, but there was no sign of her. I walked slowly past thinking that she must have popped into one of the other shops in the row while she was waiting for me. I got to the end of the row and turned on my heels. Still no Justine. I crossed the road to look in the shops on the other side, but surely she would have seen me. It must have taken me about another five minutes to get back opposite the hairdressers and then it struck me - she must be waiting inside for me. I went in and looked around the lobby, but it was empty. The receptionist looked up.

"Hi" I said. "My friend rang me a few minutes ago and asked me to meet her here. Justine Harrington. She didn't leave a message for me by any chance did she?"

She smiled back at me. "She's through in the salon with Ros" she said, "go on through".

I followed the direction of her gaze and entered the salon proper. There was a girl to my right getting the ends of her long dark hair trimmed and to my left there was a stylist using clippers to trim the nape of another customer. I forgot momentarily about looking for Justine and watched the stylist work. Whereas the stylist had at first contented herself with just cleaning up the stray hairs on this woman's neck, she then took the clippers back down to the woman's collar and started moving them a little higher. Slowly and deliberately higher, but then moving the blade away from the skin as she moved upwards, so that the full effect of the blade would not tell.

"Don't you know that it's rude to stare?" the voice said.

I blinked, a little embarrassed to have been caught. Then the embarrassment was replaced by surprise.

"Justine?" I said.

I approached the woman in the styling chair, who a few seconds ago was the anonymous focus of my attention. I caught her eye in the mirror. I looked a little higher. The hair on the top of her head was now little more than two inches long, the sides slightly less than that, and I already knew about the edges at her nape.

"I hope you appreciate this!" she said. The stylist loooked up from her work, pausing fractionally while she acknowledged me. She looked back down, her curiosity sated, and carried on with her work.

"It suits you" I said lamely.

"It better" she exclaimed.

"But why.......? I thought......"

"Spur of the moment. I just decided that it wouldn't be such a big thing and when was the last time that I changed my hair anyway?"

"But what about Paul?"

"What about him? It's my hair."

"So why all the huffing about getting it cut?" I asked.

"I don't know, it's just actually making the leap of faith in the first place isn't it?" she replied. I looked up towards the stylist who was trying her best not to look impatient while we had our little chat.

I smiled at her in an attempt to placate her slightly. "I'll let you get on" I said. The clippers flicked back on as the stylist completed the finishing touches on Justine's hair. Then there was silence again.

"How's that?" she asked, in Justine's direction.

"Short" came the monosyllabic answer. Justine smiled at what she had just done as she reached up in search of the ends of her hair. The stylist moved around behind Justine with the mirror to allow her to see the back. Justine nodded and the stylist put down the mirror and undid the fastening on the gown.

Justine stood up, unable to stop looking at herself in the mirror. She even stooped a little just to make sure that she could look as long as possible.

"Well?" she said.

"You look gorgeous, you know you do" I replied.

"I didn't mean that, I meant 'Well' as in 'Now it's your turn" she said.

The stylist stood just to one side, still holding the gown. I looked at her. I looked at Justine.

"I said I wasn't going to do it" I said.

"I know what you said......" she replied ".....now sit, the lady's waiting".

The stylist swished the gown expertly around me as I sat meekly. I looked at her and she tried to smile at me reassuringly. Her hands flicked the ends of my hair to release them from the gown and then she stood with her hands on my shoulders looking at me in the mirror.

Waiting. Waiting for me. She would have a long wait, I thought.

I sensed movement just behind me and the distance between Justine and the stylist narrowed. In the mirror I could see Justine gesture towards the clippers on the shelf beside the stylist. The stylist picked them up and showed them to Justine who in turn reached out to take them. I could see her left hand come up to meet her right and then she handed something to the stylist, although I could see that the clippers remained in her right hand. They looked different from when they were used on Justine's neck. There wasn't any plastic comb on them anymore.

"Are you sure?" the stylist said.

I thought that this was directed at me, but Justine replied quickly.

"Very" she said.

The air filled with the mechanical sound of the clippers again. They were at my forehead. I could feel the panic well up inside me. I looked across at Justine. She held her hand up, the plastic attachment from the clippers held between thumb and forefinger. I faced the mirror again. The clippers moved backwards. It was too late, I could already see that my parting was now dramatically wider. The churning in my stomach began to subside as I realised that my flippant agreement to do something several weeks ago was now a reality. My eyes started to relax back to their normal size rather than being distended by astonishment and I also became conscious of starting to breath again. The stylist bent a little further to check with me that I was okay. I nodded once and that was all the encouragement that she needed. She made quick passes across my scalp and then turned her attention to the sides. I had fully relaxed by the time that this was happening and even Justine had sensed that it was safe for her to re-appear close to my side. I smiled at her.

I started to think that it was the tone of the clippers and the gentle rhythmic movements of the stylist that relaxed me, but by the time she switched them off for the final time I was well and truly content. I no longer had any discernible hair, but I was pleased with myself for actually having gone through with my pledge.

"So, are we finishing off?" the stylist asked. I wasn't really too sure what she meant, but I had a sudden horror of being let out onto the street in an 'unfinished' state. It would be hard enough walking up the high street without having people thinking that I hadn't been 'finished off' properly.

"Yes, please" I said, surprised at my own confidence.

I quickly became aware of what she had meant. A handful of shaving foam was applied to my scalp and deftly spread over the remainder of my head. The apprehension was back, but I think that was due to the fear of being cut rather than anything. It was rare for me to get through the leg shaving process without at least one red streak down my leg, but I quickly realised that I had nothing to fear from this woman. Her strokes were gentle and confident. I bet that she didn't have a single scar on her calves!!

She turned away and then reached across me, her hands hidden in a large, soft towel. She enveloped my head, removing the last traces of foam, before stepping back and allowing me to see the final result. I smiled.

"Thank you" I said, not really knowing whether it was to the stylist or to Justine for getting me here. I stood up and reached up to Justine's newly cropped head. I ruffled her hair and gave her a hug.

"Is that the best you can do?" I said.

"It's alright for you, you don't have to go home and face the music" she said, tactlesssly rubbing in the fact that I had split up with my boyfriend last month.

"And what happened to all this 'It's MY hair' business then, Miss Independent?"

"It is, but I think I might need to break him in gradually."

The stylist led us out to reception to pay. I walked behind Justine, trying to take in the difference in her now that her hair was so much shorter.

"Can you manage it yourself, or do you want me to do it for you again in a few days?" the stylist asked me as she handed me the change.

"I'm not going to........" I started to say. I had no intention of keeping my head shaved. Not once during my long deliberations had the thought ever entered my head. It was a one off. A charity thing. Do it, get the hat, grow it, that's all I thought.

"I can do Tuesday at 10" she said.

I looked at Justine.

"Tuesday at 10, it is" I said. "For both of us." I took Justine's arm and headed for the door before she could protest.

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