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Mazazan sits in the room and starts combing her hair. Her hair is very long, heavy, shiny and silky, but there is one thing, that is always puzzling her mind. She wants to look innocent, and even as she looks so innocent, she feels that she wants to look more innocent. She says to herself, "I am so cute, but God, make me cuter."

Mazazan is an eerie girl, with dreams, wishes, desires, hopes and expectations always visiting each corner of her mind. She has a heart-shaped visage/face, and eyebrows, very good, and she is apple of all eyes, yes, all eyes. She is beauty-conscious, but she thinks so much before she takes some step, so conscious, that she has not decided about her eyebrows even. Her hair is so long, untrimmed and heavy. Now she is before the mirror, and is thinking. She is definite that today, she will DO something big. She has to decide, and comes out of the room, with a decision.

But, what is the decision? What is it?

Mazazan goes direct to..........her mother and asks her 'ma, how do i look'.
'u look very beautiful'
'only beautiful'
'why dont u go and look at urself in the mirror'
ok, she said and went in front of the full lenght mirror in her sisters room. she looked at herself and said'...................

 

'O my God, I am stunning, but my hair are somewhat over-grown. Yeah... you must be surprised at my uttering, but mom, it is a fact, that I have never shingled my hair, but today, I do not know why, but I feel, as if I had over-grown my hair.... I should do something."
'............' mom is speechless.
'Why do not you speak, mother?' she pronounces, untying her hair.

 

Her mother is stunned & puzzled that why her daughter is so over conscious about her looks when there are other better things to be honed & skilled at.

Making herself alert, her mother replied, "Mazazan, Outer beauty is not that important as inner beauty. Your hairs are fine & beautiful. There is nothing wrong in beautifying yourself but u should concentrate on sharpening your talent. Look has a short life"

Mazazan's mother "Abida" was a very simple lady. She never found mirror as her competitor. She was an average looking middle aged lady used to believe in doing well & thinking high. She also had long black shiny hairs but never spent time on looks and appearance, unlike her daughter. She was a widow as her husband had died 5 years ago in a Road Accident. Her only aim was now to look after her 2 daughters, make them a nice & independent human being and prepare to face this outside real world. But Mazazan, being eldest of the two daughters was totally in a whimsical unreal world.

Abida was worried that Mazazan's persona may not affect her younger sister "Malak". Perhaps, Malak was not so creepy like Mazazan but being four years younger to her, it was important for their mother that she should not emulate her sister Mazazan's footsteps.

On listening to her mother, Mazazan turned her topic away from hairs and landed on her skin & complexion. She asked her mother, "I will join a beauty & grooming class, in order to participate in a beauty contest and to prepare myself for the same. I want to be the most beautiful woman of this world." She had a dusky complexion and wanted to become fair in order to participate in a beauty contest. She had a fetish that fairness means beauty. Till one day a young man came into her life

and he is DIMPLE

Dimple is a lecturer in a school. He is nice, smart, intelligent, creative and had a hairfetish. He is someone, who loves her deeply. He falls in love with him at the first sight. HE writes stories, poems and novels, and had also written some syllabus books and was famous in the literary world. He asks her to have a trim. She already has a wish, but she had the fear that mom will get red.

 

mazazan goes to mahek and asks her how she would look if she cropped her hair.
'u have got such beautiful hair, mazu'
'i know, but how will i look if i trim it'
'i like long hair. i wonder when my hair will be like yours'
'sorry, i asked u', mazazan said and stormed out of the room

 

mazu goes to her room and picks up a copy of the MAXIM from the floor. She opens it and sees a pic of DEMI MOORE in short hair and she instantly makes her decision. but she aint sure , if her mother will let her and she doesn't have the money.

so she tiptoes to her father's room and puts her hand in one of the pocket of his pant that was lying there. she gets five 100 rs note. she takes 2 of them and puts the rest back and she slowly gets out of the room. but her mother sees her and asks her what she was doing here

cant i just get into this room, she asks loudly

 

It is time...

Should I? Shan't I? Should I! Shan't I?

"Do you really think you can restrict me like that?"

...................

Now, mother is hapless, helpless and speechless. She skirts back her hair, and looks at mother, "I am going for a haircut. This is my declaration. Now, will u stop me?"

Mother jumps at her, but Mazazan gives her no chance and plays down the middle aged lady, who happens to her mother, but seems no less than a devil for the young girl, whom she says, "No, no....never!!! Go to the room. I shall never permit u, no permission.....OKAY!"

Majajan ties back her hair into a braid and then a bun. The hair, waiting to be cut, sweep back to the headtop.

 

Majajan, unwillingly goes back to her room, sits infront of her mirror & looks at herself into the mirror with her big almond shaped mournful eyes. She then again opens her bun & tries to fold her hair half length to get an idea of the look she'll get after the cut.
Sighs!! hmm!! talking to herself, she says, " I wish, mom understood me, my feelings... i need to stand out among others... I can't always be the same simple, sober girl with hair tied up in a bun."
Majajan then decides that tomorrow after her college, she'll first go & have the hair cut & will face the consequences later.
That night she went to sleep, with mixed emotions of hope, anxiety & fear.

but....

She goes to bed, with her hair tied in a tight bun, but her mind is somewhere else, visualising the scene while she is sitting on the chair in the salon, with an hair-dresser attendent coming to her, asking for the job. She hesitates, but then she pronounces, 'I want to get my eyebrows done...' The public revelation of the wish for a trendy haircut is still hidden somewhere in her heart of hearts, and the visage of mother is coming to her mind, repeatedly.

"God, if dad were alive!" She reflects for the first time, in her life. When the attendent comes near her for 'doing' eyebrows, she expression horror, "What? this plucker! you will pluck out the brows?"

Her little brother, also sleeping nearby, gets surprised, 'What happened, Mazazan?' Unmindful of the fact, that she is in the bed, and just being in the parlor-world, she reinstates, "Would you pluck? Ain't it painful?"

"Painful? What sissy? What has happeded?", hearing this she realises what the hell she was doing!

"God! if Dad was alive, or.....," dreams she further, "of if mom was dead rather, or both were dead!" indicating her wistful nature and her wish for a trendy haircut, as she does not want to have a 'traditinal outlook' for ever.

'Meeta, Ruuhi and alll...... all have very nicely shaped eyebrows, and my brows are too thick to be thicker.... and my hair is ....' she thinks but can't think.

Ultimately, she goes to bed, thinking of tomorrow, when she will go to parlor and order for a trendy haircut, and she takes a page out of her 'green-horny' book (she calls it so, as it has a green horn painted on every page, and this brand-name note-books are very famous in her area), and scribbles the following schedule for tomorrow:-
1) .......
2) .......
3) ......
4) ......
5) ......

(After that she could nt sleep for the whole night. Thinking, dreaming and wishing.....visualising, hoping and fearing)

However, what were the jotted entries?

Next morning she wakes up, seems like was eagerly waiting for this morning. With dreamy eyes and a slight smile, she's looking outside her bedside window. Her hair all open but entangled... a blow of fresh air just touched them and they appeared to be as fresh as ever. Thinking, dreaming and planning.... she's again lost in her thoughts.

Forcefully, she gets out of her bed on a scream from her mother from Kitchen, " Majanan, when will you get up? Do you want to miss your bus and then your lecture? get up immediately, I have other chores to do & have to leave for office too... Get up!!"

 

Her mom's scream worked as if an alarm clock has triggered her ears. Her face immediately moved toward the clock, "Oh! God, I am already 15 minutes late." She hurriedly opens her cupboard to select her outfit...

 

There it goes again, she finds a hair band, made of silver wire with white beads beautifully weaved together in an attractive pattern. She had bought this band from a fair from her saved pocket money. It was an expensive one and she had kept it for the day when she'll show off her new trendy hair cut with this glittery, shiny band. She always use to fancy about expensive, valuable things and had the urge to have them all in her collection, actually she had a fanciful life filled with aspirations, a young girl who used to dream and also had the courage to accomplish them.

She holds the band in her hand, a smile, not the usual one, is there on her face with a twinkle in her eyes. She pauses for a second and the very next moment she hurriedly keeps it in her college bag.

Now she's searching her cupboard to find something to wear. Though she doesn't have an elaborate wardrobe, but has enough trendy clothes that one can do with it in college. Still she can't find anything... this is her daily routine job, to first search her cupboard and then sigh and sit and think of having more clothes in her collection. Today also, like always, she quietly went to her sister's cupboard and managed to find a beautiful white top which would very nicely complement her red skirt, she thought.

Title for the novel:

'An Urge...'

In the college, everything is okay, but her wish to get a trim is silently disturbing her. She is touching her hair repeatedly and is dreaming of a dream 'haircut' this evening, but the fear is hanging high and see can for-hear the screasms of mother in her ears, "What the hell have you done? Have I brought up you, only to see this day? Is not this an insult of Sikhism? Is this not an insult to girlhood, womanhood? Are you a fool?"

She also forsees herself entering a gabled salon, where a gabby girl asks her to wear a gaberdine. Like a gaby, she puts on the same, and blows up the gaffe, "I want a haircut!" Suddenly she hits a pebble, while walking down the lane in the university, as she is dreaming as well as walking.

 

And, there she is, but her mind is full of so much fear, hesitation and all. She sits on a staircase, when her boyfriend comes near her, and asks....

 

I damn care

 

"What the hell is making you so vexed? Are you all right?"She abruptly turns towards him and replys in a very foul tone uttering 'Get lost'!. But being a gud friend he stresses on asking the same and finally she tells her everything which is making her so anxious including the last day fight she had with her mom. She tries to make her understand that there are chunk of things in this world besides beauty and I suggest you to focus on them as it is the need of the hour rather than beauty. At the expense of your carrier if you get your beauty then it is completely futile. After hearing all this from her boy friend's mouth she starts considering him also as his envy and that too in a split of second and in a boorish pitch she asks him to get away from her life. The guy leaves the place with tears in his eyes and mazazan stands up and......

and...

She goes inside. Her boyfriend Dimple reflects further, what to do, what the hell had happened to his girlfriend....

She goes inside towards wash room to see herself once more in the reality-telling object named "mirror". She opens the door and stands for more than 10 minutes in front of it....

 

Akdas finally

lost in third world

this was the firdt time she was standing in the mirror and not concentrating on looks. She was confused of what happened recently. Her urge for creative new looks mixing with unpleasant blabs with her boy friend along with her mothers image shouting at her for fashion madness....... she was confused in all this. lost in third world...

 

(Clue - lets find how she finds time for getting a haircut revolting against her mom)
Take this cue/clue and go ahead with the story....

I am just hinting (am thread started, will delete it....after u write....GO AHEAD...thanks to all)

 

She was about to leave the washroom,when heard a girl's snobbings. She looked around as if jerked out of her dreams. She saw Maitri , her classmate crying. Maitri was a simple & poor girl whom she hated very much. Infact, the entire university used to tease her & make fun of her .Though , she was pretty ; she was very poor & could not afford even some decent dresses. She used to work part-time at a farmhouse to feed herself & her old grandmother with whom she lived. Her parents had mysteriously disappeared one day when she was just four years old. Noone has ever seen them again. Though she was poor, she was very intelligent , smart & helpful to all in need. Everyone around her used to tease her, but she never had grudges against anyone. Noone had ever seen her complaining or cursing anyone. Mazu thought, "there must be something very serious that she is crying ". Mazu didnt had the courage to approach her as she had insulted her a number of times.But she couldnt even leave her like this as Maitri had helped her a number of times with her assignments .

mazazan gathers all her guts to enquire about the girl she had long been due for a favor unasked. maitri, not known to complain ever in her life finally gives in to the request of the this girl more out of the hope of easing off the pain than for any other reason. maitri tells her of the neighbourhood guy who has been frightening her of serious consequences unless she agrees to do whatever he pleases. mazazan in her usual zest for life, asks the poor girl to take her to that guy thinking if he can attend to her hairy stuff she can actually take care of him thus freeing maitri of him.
mazazan, on the other hand has secretly been wishing for a guy who can take her around on a bike to parlours,fitness centres in return for accepting to accompany him for movies,shopping and parks etc making it sound like a deal. but then maitri protests saying it could be danger for her to confront him and making both of their lives tougher. mazazan,however convinces maitri saying she knows of a police who is a distant relative and that police uncle can easily straighten things out. convinced,maitri thanks mazazan and heads for home taking mazazan along. mazazan, all the way long wishing the boy to be a kind of guy who can fit her demands and thus find her little demands of life sorted out without a fuss from homefront.

they get down from the bus and see the guy waiting for them

While travelling in the bus, Majanan was as usual lost in her dreams and was wondering about the guy she will be meeting soon. Maitri was quiet and trying to figure out about Majanan's intentions and her next action. To Majanan's surprise, the guy appeared to be far much better in appearance than what she was expecting...

 

Lets make her get to the salon as early as possible,
so that she can get a HAIRCUT after all, her wish, her long-cherished desire

Her hair, long tresses, are waiting for the scissors' touch....
(Who will do it?)

Mazazan looks at the guy and again starts thinking if she manages to get him into the deal she has secretly wished for, her dreams would actually be coming true. She also sees a cool bike on which he is sitting and raising the accelerator, and by the way he gazes at her, she calculates that she can somewhat easily make him dance to her tunes.

That guy, who also has same fascinations as Mazazan, calls himself Rahul, the present trend of hero name in movies, but "God knows" his real name, as it changes with trend. He is a movie buff. He has a fair complexion with neck-long black thick shiny hair which is at back tied as a ponytail and front hair hanging on his cheeks – it's a Shah Rukh and John Abraham mixed look. He has dark brown eyes, gym-built physique, and cool looks. He wears trendy clothes to show off to females around him as if he is a hero and a rich guy. He has this x-factor that any girl would get attracted to him and he too would say the latest famous dialog from a movie "Heyy baby" "wo ladki mujhe nahin paTti jisse main paTana nahin chahta houn". He basically works as mechanic. His father is a construction worker and a half-drunkard. He has no siblings with him and his mother is no more. He is a carefree, happy-go-lucky and has a typical teenager mind guy who flirts as almost another profession.

Rahul who was getting frustrated that Maitri cares a damn about him, now suddenly that intense attention is shifted towards Mazazan.

Mazazan gives him a look of interest, but both talk in their eyes "hey sexy.." kind of look. Mazazan goes off with Maitri to her home as if she had come with her to visit her place.

 

As Mazazan enters Maitri's small house, which is smaller than her home, she gives an attitude and makes faces as if a very rich girl has come to some dirty hut. She still goes in. Maitri introduces her grandmother, who is a frail, dark old lady with a hunchback and a branch in her left hand so as to assist herself in walking. Mazazan just gives a smile. This hurts Maitri as she had no basic culture of greeting an elderly person. She does not show it up, but wont worry much about it as she already know what kind of person Mazazan is. Maitri offers her water in a plastic tumbler, but she refuses and says she now has to get back to home. Maitri asks her to wait for a minute and goes into the small garden back of her house.

In the meantime, Mazazan wonders how to initiate talks with that guy. She does not want to miss the chance of getting started with him. She was, however, sure that even he was waiting to talk to her.

Maitri comes in and gives her a beautiful red rose as a gesture of appreciation that she had come to her house with her and had offered to sort out her issues. Mazazan accepts it thinking that she would give it to this guy waiting there out.

Mazazan and Maitri both come out of the house and Maitri reiterates Mazazan that, that guy is not a good fellow and is dangerous if his wishes are not fulfilled. "He is still hoping that I might someday accept his wishes and I guess, therefore he has not yet harmed me. You please be careful or you better stop worrying about me. I will try to think of some other way out."

Mazazan thinks she is not a fool to leave this, what she thinks, a wish-come-true opportunity – a cool guy and also feels to fit into her deal. She gives Maitri a sarcastic smile and tells her, "I better know to take care of myself, now he will dance to my tunes", and looks at the guy sitting on his bike watching her.

 

...

She moves forward towards the guy, passes near him, and goes to the bus stand. Now Mazazan becomes the guy's latest interest. He turns his bike and speeds high and come to the bus stand and stops in front of her and raises his accelerator looking at her through his cooling glasses painted on his own at a corner of one of the glasses as Ray-Ban.

Mazazan's mind starts working. She thinks that now she has got this guy who also is of her type and wonders that she would ultimately get a chance to cut of her long tresses and if her mother violates then she would persuade him to make a place for her to live. Her desire for the hair cut gets so stronger suddenly that she starts getting absurd thoughts, but which she thinks is a way to hide herself if something untoward would happen when she goes with her hair cut in front of her mother. All thoughts get so intense and that guy also raises the accelerator so loud that she without thinking further gives him that red rose which Maitri gave her. He takes it and gives a winning smile. She sits back on the bike and he asks him where to go. She first hesitates to tell him to take her to beauty parlor, but then comes out of her hesitation and at once starts giving him directions towards the beauty parlor near her college where her friends would go.

Rahul gets perplexed when she asks him to stop in front of a beauty parlor! She asks him to wait there for some time. She goes in and without thinking much and not even looking into the mirror, she, at one breath says the attendant to do her favorite haircut.

 

The attendant unlocks the long beautiful thick shiny hair and she is not sure if what she heard was right to cut off the hair into a small length. The attendant again confirms from Mazazan if she really wanted her hair cut to that length. Mazazan has long stopped thinking from when she saw the guy in the bus stand, and just says, "yes, you heard it right, now cut it off without a word", she says hurriedly as she starts getting worried if her mind lose the strength and courage that she has now and go back home without having a hair cut. The attendant cuts off her long hair to the length and shape she desired for, with a heavy heart though, and then after finishing cutting, the attendant tells Mazazan, "mam, here is your new look!".

Mazazan now opens her eyes and looks herself into the mirror and she is happy about how she is looking. She hurriedly checks for her bag, searches for the band that she had put in her bag in the morning and wears it. Now she feels relieved and feels great that she has achieved something that she had longed for a long time now. She feels herself as a brave fighter, all such courage gets filled in her, and now she is beaming with happiness of achievement, breaking rules and gives a "cool" attitude look and praises herself at the way she is looking at the mirror. She is feeling on top of the world.

 

All this while , Rahul was busy thinking what is it all about. He hardly knew Maazan and here he is waiting for her outsite a parlour like an idiot......He was still busy in his thoughts , when Maazan comes out of the parlour with her new haircut. He was completely amazed at her new look as was unable to make out her intentions.

 

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